


Invisible to the Eye

by wendymr



Category: Lewis (TV)
Genre: Dialogue-Only, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-04-09
Updated: 2014-04-09
Packaged: 2018-01-18 17:49:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 969
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1437268
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wendymr/pseuds/wendymr
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"What's that supposed to mean?"</p>
            </blockquote>





	Invisible to the Eye

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Lindenharp](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lindenharp/gifts), [uniquepov](https://archiveofourown.org/users/uniquepov/gifts).



"Can't help noticing, Inspector Hathaway, that your tonsorial standards have regressed."

"In what way?"

"You've gone back to bein' a skinhead, man."

"I do wish you wouldn't call it that, sir. Just because I prefer my hair to be a bit closer-cropped of late..."

"And there's another thing. You're an inspector. I'm a retired inspector. Why the bloody hell are you calling me sir?"

"Force of habit, I suppose. Does it bother you?"

"Just think it sounds daft. But then, your hair looks a bit daft, so I suppose you can be all daft if you like."

"Just because you've had the same haircut for the past twenty years doesn't mean we've all got to."

"S'pose my hair's got a bit shorter, too. Natural causes, though, in my case."

"Yes, and not uniformly."

"We don't all have to have buzzcuts, Inspector."

"And some of us aren't going bald, Retired Inspector."

"Feels pretty close to bald up there, lad."

"By choice. There's the difference. Also, have you seen the prices for hair product lately? Bloody ridiculous."

"You must be using decent shampoo, at least. Soft as a bairn's arse, the little hair you've got."

"...you seem a bit fascinated with my hair."

"Not much else changes about you, does it, James? Not that I'm complaining. Like a bit of consistency in me mates."

"What is essential is invisible to the eye, sir."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"More can change than just someone's outward appearance."

"All right, then, what's changed? You've been promoted, yeah, but... You're drinking less coffee?"

"Again, sir, that's visible."

"All right... You've donated your appendix to a worthy cause?"

"Oh, how I wish that were true."

"You have appendicitis now? Should I call an ambulance?"

"Very droll, but no."

"You're now entirely focused on becoming Chief Constable by the time you're fifty."

"Yes. You've guessed it. My ambition has no bounds. Although fifty seems a bit late. I'm trying for forty."

"Better get a move on, then. You've got less than two years."

"Will you help me if I give you a position as my chief hair-ruffler?"

"Do chief constables need a chief hair-ruffler?"

"They do if they let their hair grow a bit longer than this."

"In that case, sign me up."

"Good! You'll like life at the top."

"Can't see why. Never wanted it before. An' I'm retired now."

"Because you like me. And I'll be there."

"Well, that's true. I like you, I suppose. Could just meet you down the pub every once in a while, like we've done for the last year."

"Make it every twice in a while and you've got a deal."

"S'pose I could. As long as you're not too busy with what's invisible to the eye."

"I promise not to be. Provided you still provide the hair-ruffling."

"And provided you're not missing your opportunity."

"I think, given our conversations down the pub, sir, I could forego the opportunity."

"You haven't fooled me, lad."

"Sorry?"

"I know you. Been watching you carefully for the last hour. You're in love."

"...maybe."

"No maybe about it, man."

"I refuse to incriminate myself."

"It's not incriminating yourself if I guess."

"I suppose I can't stop you guessing."

"It's a bloke."

"..."

"Stands to reason. None of the women you saw ever made you happy."

"If by 'never made me happy' you mean treated me badly and attempted to kill me, yes, that's true."

"Well, this bloke better treat you like you deserve, or he'll have me to answer to."

"That would be quite the sight, sir."

"Oi! I can be intimidating when I want to!"

"Oh, I don't doubt that."

"So? Is he good to you?"

"Very good."

"Glad to hear it. And when do I get to meet him, then? Got to make sure he's good enough for you. Not many would be, mind."

"Thank you, but that's...I'm not sure that would work."

"Why not? Ashamed of me, are you?"

"No, not at all."

"So? Phone him. Tell him to meet us at the Trout in half an hour."

"Ah. Yes. There...could be a slight complication with that."

"You don't want me to meet him."

"No. It isn't that, I promise. I...happen to believe you'd get on very well. It's only..."

"What?"

"...he doesn't know."

"Doesn't know what? That you've got a best mate looking out for your interests?"

"He doesn't know how I feel."

"Oh, James."

"I know. I...I know."

"Why haven't you told him, lad?"

"I don't know if he'd take it very well."

"Christ, it's not Peterson, is it?"

"I hope you know I have better taste than that."

"I'd hope so, but on past evidence... Seriously, James, you're a bloody marvellous bloke. Anyone'd be lucky to have you want them."

"Thank you. I've...hoped for a long time he would...feel the same. Wished he would."

"James, just ask him. Then you'll know one way or another, won't you?"

"And if he says no, I'll have ruined everything."

"No, you won't."

"All right. Sir...Robbie...how do you feel about me?"

"Thought you'd never ask, love."

"...you knew?"

"Course I sodding well did. Didn't get me inspector's stripes down at the Oxfam shop, did I?"

"Even if you did, sir, I'll never tell."

"Smartarse."

"Always."

"My smartarse."

"Yes, please."

"All right, then."

"Robbie? I'm glad you made me ask you."

"See? I'm still the brains, aren't I?"

"...which makes me the brawn?"

"You're too skinny for that."

"I did row."

"What, nearly fifteen years ago? Nah, you're the pretty one."

"I'll take it."

"And I'll take you. Someone has to."

"I'm glad it's you."

"Yeah, s'pose I'm glad it's you, too. Who else would quote Aquinas and Chaucer to me in the same sentence?"

"Happy to have that monopoly."

"All yours, pet, all yours."


End file.
